Laundry Nazis

Today, as I was browsing my Yahoo! homepage, I came across this little gem of a story: In case you don’t have time to read the whole thing, I will recap: Essentially, home owner’s associations, snooty neighbors, and annoyed local officials all across the country are turning up their noses at people who line-dry their laundry. Home owner’s associations often penalize members with fines, and neighbors and officials are requesting that the dread-pirate underpants be dried inside. Some communities are striking back against the “no-line-drying” outcry with laws protecting those who choose to let it all hang out (on the clothesline).  Advocates of line-drying point out that using the clothesline instead of the dryer saves money and energy (it’s a green way to dry your clothes, in other words).

So, I’m really not even sure where to START with this article. It made me palmface pretty hard. First, who the heck cares where you dry your laundry? If you don’t want to look at someone else’s skivvies… then DON’T LOOK. The lady interviewed in the article even said that she had been hanging her underthings inside so neighbors wouldn’t see them, but they still complained about them, even though they weren’t out on the line.

Second, this economy is pretty gosh darn crappy. If people want to save money by line-drying their clothes, then I’m all for it. As a born and bred cheap skate, I have to applaud the efforts to save a dime exhibited by these savvy washerwomen (and men).

Third, home owner’s associations are notoriously hoity-toity about EVERYTHING, and I personally think the people who live under their crushing and oppressive eyeball should tell them where they can stuff their ridiculous fines and requirements. If I buy a house, that house is MINE and I will do damn well what I please with it. If I want to paint it blue with green polka dots, put up 4 sheds and a barn in the backyard, put my Camry up on blocks in the driveway, and dry my laundry on the line, I will. I don’t tell you what to do with YOUR house, so you can back the hell up off of mine.

Fourth, people of a liberal political persuasion should be thrilled about this rejection of modern technology in favor of a more “green” alternative. If your argument is, “Well, I’m trying to save money…and the PLANET!” who can really argue with you, provided your actions do not increase taxes or harm/inconvenience other people?

Fifth, is this really what we’re complaining about these days? We can’t find more constructive ways to spend our time, so we’re harping on our neighbors’ laundry routine? I say, end the oppression. Live and let live, in the laundromat and on the clothesline.


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